Back.

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So, where do I start?

I guess I could start where I left off, but to be perfectly honest, I’m not sure I can remember that far back. Actually, I’m absolutely positive I can’t remember that far back. If you like, just picture a montage of general working adult life spliced in with important developments during that period of blog silence. To help, play some uplifting eighties music in the background while looking at these pictures:

DECORATING!

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SON!!

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NEW SON!!!

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Jesus. Actually, a lot has happened. I guess I could go into some detail. I’ll ignore the decorating one though, I’ll leave that up to your imagination.

Ned is doing pretty well, actually. Since his diagnosis, we’ve had nothing but support from the mainstream preschool he attends, and the specialist pre-school he goes to once a week. His ‘special’ school has improved his communication hugely – he now asks for things in full sentences, and that’s all down to using a PECS book – which to the uneducated, is kind of like a Filofax, full of items a phrases. Ned assembles a sentence, passes it to us and speaks it out loud, phrases like ‘I want Cake Please?’ is something you’ll be surprised to learn gets used a lot. He’s developing at a rate that is slower than your standard non-autistic kid, but he IS developing. We’re now tentatively looking at schools for next year, which is exciting and terrifying in equal  measure. Regardless of his diagnosis, he is still the happiest damn kid I have ever met, and as long as he’s happy, then I’m happy.

Secondly, and just as importantly, you’ll notice that there is a new member to the family. Kit was born in November, and currently just over four months old (which, coincidentally, was the age Ned was at when I started this blog) if we’re comparing them, Kit is a lot easier to handle than Ned – Kit’s already slept for five hours in a row, whereas you’re lucky if Ned does that now (he’s three years old) He’s just started laughing, which, as a childs laughter is the fuel that keeps me youthful and handsome, has now been my sole goal every night to get out of him. He’s been starting to show signs of a personality, and it’s not one I’m yet a fan of, to be honest. He demands your attention constantly, and shouts if you’re not looking at him, like some attention seeking diva, but he returns that attention with a beautiful smile, which reminds you why you should be looking at him in the first place.

There is so much to talk about – especially about Neds development that I’m not going to ramble on about for one post, but I imagine I’ll mention bits and bobs as I carry on writing.

It was never my intention to stop writing this blog for so long – Since I’ve been away not only did I not document the birth of Kit, but I didn’t cover Neds third birthday or Christmas. I feel awful about that, but the reasons were a mix of simple lack of time, and a worry that I wouldn’t be able to write in the same way since Ned has been officially diagnosed. At times, I look at him doing the things he does, or I have a one sided conversation with him and it feels like a punch to the gut, and my fear was I would transfer that  despair and heartbreak to my writing, which puts me off. I’ve now come to realise that if that does happen then it’s okay, because not every day will be like that, and it’s just as important to document the bad days as it is the good ones, and maybe – just maybe – someone in our position will find it helpful.

And if one person does, then I guess it’s worth it, right?

See you soon.

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